Life is Precious

As we move into the fourth week of the stay at home experience, I would like to take a moment to reflect.

This time alone has opened me up in a new way, a new experience. The mounting death toll. The human tragedy taking place day after day. The horrific news of thousands dying alone with only a nurse and, perhaps, FaceTime with a loved one. The overworked and under protected health care personnel. The refrigerator trucks for bodies. The trenches of graves for the unidentified. The news is so overwhelming it is impossible for me to get my linear mind around it all.

What I have come to is an awareness of what is real and what is transitory. The thoughts, appointments and things that heretofore filled my days are not that important in the larger sense. They come, they go. What is important is connection with family and friends and the sheer experience of being alive. For both these things I am profoundly grateful.

I live each day in an increased sense if gratitude. A small sample of the endless things that bring great joy into my life.

• My continued good health and that of my family.

• Weekly Zoom meetings - a new and precious moment to connect with my children and grandchildren.

• My friends and larger family. We check on one another on various platforms frequently.

• My spiritual community with whom I interact each week.

On a daily basis I become increasingly aware of the beauty and privilege of being alive. There is a new notice and appreciation for the gifts, for the little things that inform my day.

• The brisk April wind blowing through my hair, My breath steady beneath my mask as I walk in the street.

• The swath of red tulips growing down the middle of Park Avenue.

• The joy of Charlie, my young Toy Poodle, who views each walk as an unbelievable adventure. He is teaching me to see this differently.

• The opportunity to actually play with my dogs each day, to throw toys and play fetch.

• Easter flowers for sale at the checkout counter

• A hightened appreciation for those who work in previously unnoticed positions who now are the heroes of the hour. The grocery store clerks, the delivery men on their bikes and in the vans, the mail carriers. I see, finally, the honor in all forms of work.

In this enforced solitude I understand more deeply what lasts and what does not; what I need to thrive and what I do not. What amazing gifts are in my life and how precious is this body and this life.

A truly staggering pandemic has within it a silver lining. My fervent hope is that we will take this opportunity to look within, to grow, to become more generous and empathic. To look without at a social structure showing us its imperfection in technicolor. To consider ways for both to heal.

Life is precious. How do we make ours count?